Just the Facts
by Agent66
Summary: A murdered man, mysterious body disappearances, and zombies mark a night of mixed conclusions. Prequel to 'House Arrest'.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This story is the direct prequel, if you will, to my previous story, "House Arrest". Please read that before venturing into this. It's fairly short and gives a bit of background. This is based on a season five episode of The X-Files, entitled "Bad Blood". You don't have to have seen it in order to enjoy the story, but it may be helpful to get a better understanding. Unfortunately, it is not an easy epiosde to find online, so you may have to download it if unable to find it. LIke the previous story, I am basing the turtles on the 2003 cartoon series (not including FF or BTTS)

DISCLAIMER - TMNT and its characters are property of Eastman, Laird, and Mirage Studios. The X Files are property of Chris Carter and 20th Century Fox

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**Just the Facts**

**Prologue**

The night air was slightly chilly in New York, as the beginning of winter began to creep upon the residents. While the night sky darkened to give way to midnight, the stillness quickly gave way to screams. The life of one young man hung in balance as he ran through the back alleys of Manhattan, panting and legs hurting from the exertion.

Even as he ran, he screamed, hoping someone, _anyone_ would hear his pleas. But he knew, being a New Yorker, the chances of getting help were slim to none – rather, none to none. The man took a risk by looking back at his pursuer and was frightened as the being seemed to getting closer, almost right on the boy's heels. Frantically, the younger man pressed on, his path taking him to the Westside of Central Park and hopefully towards some sort of safety within the group of trees ahead.

Feeling the breath of his follower on his neck, the young man tried pushing himself harder, faster. He could probably escape in the streets of Harlem; he knew his way around down there, he knew shortcuts and he hoped to God or whoever that his pursuer didn't know anything about the sublet city. Bursting through a clearing in the park, the young man ignored scratches and bruises that the trees made; he only cared about one thing.

Safety.

His hopes however were soon dashed when he was tackled from behind and both figures hit the ground hard. The young man struggled, trying to find some sort of leverage against his attacker; literally fighting for his life. The pursuer, shorter though obviously built like a wall, didn't give much leeway to his prey. He pushed away flailing arms and kept his prey's lower half immobile by sitting on his legs. The attacker suddenly grabbed something from its belt and the man knew he was in trouble when he saw the glint of steel in the moonlight.

If anything, his screams got louder and he struggled more, which seemed to irritate the attacker. Seeing an opening, the young man saw the blade come down and enter his chest once, then twice. Then he knew no more.

His attacker meanwhile gave a third stab, leaving the weapon protruding out of the man's chest. A disturbance behind him caused the attacker to see who would be coming after him. Turning, the moon caught sight of not a man, but what seemed to be a large turtle, one whose mask was as red as the blood that poured from the man's chest. A group of three more turtles came closer, each wearing a different colored mask and kneeling next to the first and the body. The newcomers were out of breath, but also seemed rather shocked at the body that lay on the ground.

The red masked turtle pointed to the body, though more specifically to the blood that seemed to be around the victim's mouth. "See?" he asked. "See?"

One of the other turtles, one that seemed to be wearing purple, also looked at the blood around the mouth. Taking a burly finger, he brushed some off and stared at it in the moonlight. Then he sniffed it, before tentatively putting his tongue to his finger in order to taste it.

"Oh gross, Donnie!"

The purple turtle, the one named Donnie, looked at his red masked friend. "It's not blood," he whispered.

The other three were of course confused, especially the red turtle. He repeated the actions Donnie had made, tasting the apparent blood before his face drained of color.

"It's not blood," Donnie repeated. "It's pizza sauce."

The red turtle's eyes widened, if they hadn't be wide already once he had also confirmed what Donnie had reported. There was really only one thing he could say to something like this.

"Oh sh…"

**Chapter I**

Trudging through the sewers on a Friday night wasn't exactly a fun time for all, especially after the day they had. Four beings, four turtles to be exact, were taking a normal route to their underground lair that they called home. Usually, after a night of being above – what they termed 'topside' - the four were mostly rambunctious and playing around. This night however seemed to just be the culmination of a bad day gone completely wrong.

This was especially grating on Leonardo, who was deemed as the eldest of his three brothers. This day had gone from bad to worse in the span of the last sixteen hours and it seemed it had gotten worse before it had gotten better. But to, of course, top it off, Master Splinter would be returning home soon and they would have to explain to him why they had just…apparently murdered an innocent man in cold blood.

This was not good.

Upon reaching the hidden area where their home lay, Leo turned to look at his brothers. "What're we going to do?" he asked.

"About what?" His brother Raphael asked him, entering their domain behind his little brother, Donatello.

"About…are you kidding me?" he exclaimed. "I'm not the one who did the sneak sneak, stab stab!"

Leo waited until all four of them were inside and through the entrance before he again brought up their situation. "Master Splinter will be home within the hour," he stressed. "What're we going to tell him?"

"We'll tell him what we saw," Raph pointed out. "Why? What're you gonna tell him?"

"I'll tell him exactly what _I_ saw."

"How is that different?"

Leo gave his more temperamental brother a look that clearly stated what he thought the difference was.

"Okay," the youngest named Michelangelo interrupted, looking between both of his arguing brothers. "Now you're both scaring me. We're gonna go to prison and you can't agree on a story?"

"Prison?" Leo exclaimed. "You're actually worried about prison, when the worst thing that can happen is our dissection?" Turning to the other two turtles, he said, "Mikey's right though. This _is_ scaring me. We just killed a man – _an innocent man_ – for…for what exactly, I don't even know! I want to hear what you guys plan on telling Master Splinter when he gets here."

"You mean you want our stories straight," Raph stated.

"I just want to hear what you saw today," Leo amended. "In your own words."

"I don't think I feel comfortable with that," Donnie mentioned, a discouraged look on his face.

"Prison, Donnie," Mikey stressed, leading the others into the kitchen so they could sit around the table. Well, so the others could sit, Mikey wanted a snack. "Your cellmate's name is gonna be Big Bob. He's gonna like lifting weights. A lot."

"Think about Big Bob," Leo said, taking a seat at the table. "But this time as the scientist who's dissecting you."

Donnie sighed, knowing that he was obviously outnumbered here. "Alright," he said, taking a deep breath.

"From the beginning."

"The _very_ beginning?" the brainy turtle asked, to which his elder brother nodded. "This morning started normally. Master Splinter had gone over to April's for an all day soap marathon, so he had given us a free day. Mikey was in the kitchen making breakfast, Raph was watching TV, you, Leo, were training, of course. I was in my room…"


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter II**

_The day was going fairly well for one mutant turtle named Donatello. His teacher and father had given them a free day, as he was taking the day to sit and watch soap operas all day long. It was perfect. It gave the intelligent turtle time to work on a game program he'd been coding off and on for nearly two weeks. With the downtime they had without the Foot and the Shredder trying to take over the city or the world, the lull provided an outlet to pursue other things, well for him at least._

_He knew his brothers, his older brothers that is, were suffering from boredom and lack of excitement, something that catching random Purple Dragons seemed to lift their spirits for all of a minute. At least Mikey seemed to find something to do, whether it was learning more exotic ways to make even the basic foods to having all night video game wars with anyone who couldn't get away fast enough. This extra free day should've been just great._

_Well, until Raphael came in._

"Raphael came in, apparently in a more…exhuberant mood than he usually is."

"_Hey Donnie!" cried the temperamental turtle. "Wanna start the day by kicking evil zombie ass!?"_

"_What?"_

"_Zombies," Raph repeated. "You know, the living dead?"_

"I of course pointed out that the possibilities of zombies were a fabrication."

"_You realize zombies are a complete fabrication," Donnie replied. "They aren't real."_

"_Nuh uh."_

"_Yeah uh!" Donnie insisted, before realizing that he was acting childish. "Besides, why would there be zombies in New York?"_

_Raph shrugged. "Go ask Mikey," he said. "He's the one who's spouting about a zombie attack."_

"Of course I was curious," Donnie continued. "So I went out into the living room to find out what was going on. Apparently, Mikey had heard that bodies were mysteriously disappearing, though the most disturbing fact was that the bodies were apparently those of local homeless people. The Professor called and directed us to the office of Juliene Duffy, who has been giving medical care to our friends for about a month.

"Leo, of course, was a bit hesitant at going out during the day…"

"_But there're people out there!" Leo exclaimed, trying to halt the procession that was heading to the door. "They'll get us! They'll take out our eyes and our hearts and and…and other stuff vital to our existence!"_

"_Leo, calm down!" Donnie stressed. "We'll be in Battle Shell the Second and we're going someplace where people know us. Everything will be alright."_

"We then proceeded to Juliene's office, where The Professor and Jules met us."

_The medical office of Juliene Duffy was small, something local to treat those that could not or were not treated. It was something that had come together with the help of the Professor, Casey Jones, and the turtles. Juliene, who was a registered nurse and held a Phd in biology, found that her talents were best utilized by helping those that couldn't help themselves._

_Juliene herself was a petite woman, with dark red hair and hazel eyes, and a mind that nearly rivaled Donnie's own interests. The Professor greeted the four when they entered the back of the building, out of sight from prying eyes. Donnie was of course happy to see Jules; she reminded him of April sometimes, especially when he hadn't gotten to see his best friend in some time. He didn't know what it was, but he seemed to find a lot in common with redheads._

"_I'm glad you could come," the nurse greeted them and headed for a table in the center of the room. "Here's the body, one Travis Holstein." The white sheet that covered the man was thrown off, showing a young man that seemed to be in his late twenties and wearing a Hawaiian shirt. _

"_Festive!" Mikey cried, looking at the man. "He's gonna be a stylish zombie."_

"_Zombie?" asked the elderly professor._

"_Don't mind Mikey, Professor," Donnie said, turning to the nurse. "No exam has been done?"_

"_No," Jules said. "After conferring with the Professor, he thought it best if we waited until you could see this as well. Once the police have him and then the coroner, we'll never get the opportunity again."_

"_What can you tell me about this man's death?"_

"_Well," the woman began. "It's so strange. Everything appears to be a case of sudden death, except for this." Moving the man's arm, they could clearly see that someone had literally taken a bit out of it._

"_Dude," Mikey gagged. "Clear case of zombie. See, Donnie? Your 'theory' is clearly wrong."_

"_Your theory?" The Professor asked, once again confused._

"_He's mad because my 'theory' is completely realistic."_

"_Which is?" Juliene asked. "Your theory, I mean."_

"_Well," Donnie began, clearly getting into his lecture mode. "I seriously doubt that there are zombies, however it's quite clear this man probably didn't die by natural cases, but the bite mark isn't an indicator of motus operendi."_

"_Method?"_

"_Something else," the brainy turtle murmured. "However, this could be a case of someone who 'believes' they're a zombie. Obviously the killer has a thing for cannibalism."_

"_Right," Jules nodded, stepping closer to Donnie. "Zombie believer. Yeah."_

"_And," Donnie continued, flushing a bit at the proximity of the pretty nurse. "In order to…satisfy his needs, he feels compelled to kill and then try and consume his victims."_

"_Satisfy, gotcha."_

_Donnie continued his assessment, completely unaware of anyone else in the room, especially not his brothers who were watching the whole exchange. "Complete classic sign of someone in need of some…serious help," the purple branded brain finished._

"_Wow," Jules sighed, obviously awed at Don's deduction. "You really know your stuff, Don Don."_

"Don Don?" Mikey crowed. "She's never called you that or anything other than your full name!"

Donnie's face began to grow a faint red in embarrassment. "Are you gonna let me to finish my story?" he asked.

"Please," Leo said. "Continue."

"Don Don," snickered Raph.

Grimacing, Don began once again. "It was this time that Raph noticed an…oddity on our victim."

"_You really know your stuff, Donatello," Jules replied._

"_Hey," Raph replied, moving down the table until he reached the dead man's feet. "Did you change anything on this guy?"_

"_What do you mean, Raphael?" The Professor asked._

"_You mean is this the way he was found?" Jules asked, to which Raph nodded. "Yes. He was only moved in here in order to preserve evidence, if you will."_

"_Then explain to me why this man's shoes are untied!"_

_Everyone looked at the red branded turtle. _

"_This means something," Raph whispered. "Quick, is there a cemetery around here? Something off the beaten path, the creepier and darker the better?"_

_Jules nodded._

"_Take us there," Raph insisted, snapping his fingers. "All 'cept you, Donnie. You have to stay and do an autopsy."_

"_Do a what?" Donnie cried. Rushing over to Raph, he said, "I don't know how to perform an autopsy! I've never done one before!"_

"_No time like the present to learn!"_

"_Wait," Don stated, stopping Raph before he could leave again. "What exactly am I looking for?"_

_Raph stared him right in the eye, before putting his hands on his brother's shoulders. "I don't know," he said, before heading out with everyone else._

_Donnie had always enjoyed learning things, even if on the fly. However, learning how to do an autopsy was not in his top ten list of things he wanted to learn without instruction. But Donatello was an intelligent turtle and therefore used his talents for things he knew. So, he took a blood sample and was analyzing it while making a Y incision. He wasn't a stranger of course to stitching up people – he had somehow become the resident doctor in their family – so taking a body apart should be fairly easy, right?_

_He watched the Discovery Channel. How hard could it be?_

_Doing a Y incision was slightly harder than he realized, but once he opened the chest cavity, it was just a simple maze of organs he had to maneuver around. Thinking perhaps their victim had been drugged, Donnie looked for any type of needle mark; not finding one, the only recourse was to check the stomach contents, which Donnie was definitely not looking forward to._

_Before he got in too deep, the turtle realized he should probably be making an account of this, for prosperity. Finding a recorder, he noticed the tape seemed to free of any previous audio, so he began to record his findings. "This is the autopsy of one Travis Holstein," he began. "Someone who is probably having a worse day than I am. Though I can at least attest to the fact that I'm still alive. Blood has been taken in order to see if any hostile substance was entered into his body. Y incision began at ten-seventeen, though I have no desire to actually pick my way through someone's innards._

"_Though oddly enough, I'm gonna rifle through this guy's stomach. And here we go. Last meal consumed was…pizza. With pepperoni, mushrooms, peppers…hmm…" Donnie pondered that for a bit. "That actually sounds pretty good."_

"So after I finished the autopsy, I came back here, thinking my day was done."

_Donnie was beat. Beat and tired, though some of that was his fault for going to bed so late the night before. Now, back in the lair, the allure of his new invention – a massage chair – was almost begging him to sit in it. He had come across the elegant chair one night while on a junk run, seeing that it had probably been a very expensive present for someone or an occasion. The only thing that had been wrong was that a wire had shorted out, which Donnie had quickly fixed._

_Now, after standing for several hours and bending over for part of that, Donnie found that who ever had gotten rid of this chair must be kicking themselves now because this was probably the best massage he ever had. He had ordered a pizza from their usual place before taking a grateful seat in the greatest chair ever made. He knew he would need to get up eventually in order to get his pizza, but…oh dear heavens, this was the best. Nothing could ruin this._

_Not even Raph's stormy entrance could disrupt him._

"_Choral hydrate."_

"_Say what?"_

"_Choral hydrate," Donnie repeated, eyes closed and enjoying his massage. "Otherwise known as knockout drops." Donnie raised his eyes, before they scrunched in confusion. "What the shell happened to you?"_

_Raphael looked like he had gotten beaten up by a tractor trailer. He was nearly covered head to toe in mud and dirt and it looked like he had several scratches that needed attending to. Good thing they were in the lab. "Nothing," replied the turtle. "Who slipped him the mickey?"_

"_Uh…I'm guessing the killer," Donnie stumbled. "No really, what the heck happened to you?"_

"_Nothing," Raph repeated. "So why would the killer slip the guy a mickey?"_

_Donnie stood, obviously not liking the way his brother looked, and headed to the cabinet for some bandages. "No clue," he stated. "Though I'm thinking it was to get the victim in a relaxed state so that he could…have a bite, so to speak. The dosage was fairly high, so perhaps it was an overdose."_

"_Hmmm…" Raph said. "Leo and Mikey are on the streets checking some leads and Case and me found another body. You need to do another autopsy."_

"_What?" asked Donnie, completely surprised. "Right now?"_

"_Yep."_

"_But…but…" the engineer spurted. "What about my massage?"_

"_I won't let it go to waste!" Raph replied, hopping into the chair and enjoying the massage that was rightfully Donnie's._

_For the aforementioned turtle, he watched as his brother enjoyed his massage. And making a mental sigh, he called up the pizza place to let them know that he wouldn't be needing his pizza. His deliscious, tasty pizza. Though, as luck would have it, Angel happened to work at their usual place now and told Donnie she'd be delivering the pizza instead of the guy who was signed up. The intelli-turtle told her to give Mikey or Leo a call, as they may be in the area. Not only would they eat his pizza, but they were going to pay for it too._

_Again, for the turtle in purple, it was a good thing that Jules managed to secure the body before the police could, as that meant he could do the autopsy and maybe even find the killer in order to hand over to the cops. Back in Jules' office, Donnie found one Michael John Sims on a similar table to that of Mr. Holstein._

"So skipping both lunch and sleep," Donnie continued. "I got started on the next body."

"_Blood sample is the same," Donnie sighed. "As…the guy before. High levels of a mickey. Dear God, I sound like Raph. Y incision begun at…way past the time I should have eaten something. Innards look like…innards" Before he could finish, the ringing of his shell cell caused him to look over. The display identified it as Leo, but Donnie needed to keep working so he put his hand free headset on and answered._

"_Feeling bad about taking my pizza?" he asked sarcastically. His only answer was the form of breathing. Heavy breathing. "Leo?" Again, his query was answered by more breathing. "Right. It's been lovely speaking with you, goodbye." Hanging up, Donnie sighed for a second time. "What was I doing?" he asked himself. "Yeah.. Stomach contents. Stomach contents show…pizza…" _

_Something about the contents triggered for Donnie, so strongly he gasped._

"_The choral hydrate is in the pizza!"_

_He gasped again._

"_A pizza delivery guy is giving out pizzas to his victims!"_

_Another gasp._

"_Leo!"_

_Donnie quickly made a beeline for the Battle Shell, which he had driven over. Using the comm. Systems, he was able to trace and find Leo, though he it took him nearly five minutes to get to the alley where he was. Completely on alert, Donnie was out of the van and had his bo at the ready. Only a few feet from him lay his oldest brother and apparently, the killer was standing over him. "Hey!" Well, that got his attention, though Donnie wasn't sure if he wanted the killer's attention on __**himself**__, just…away from Leo. Hearing footsteps behind him, he was happy to have the assist from his other two brothers as they arrived on the scene._

_Their suspected killer turned to them, and ran at them, nearly knocking Donnie over. They watched the killer run, but were reluctant until Leo was declared alright. They hurried over, checking the downed turtle. "Leo?" Donnie asked, giving his shoulder a shake. "Leo, you okay?"_

"_Who's the black private dick who's the sex machine to all the chicks?" Leo asked, in a drugged stupor. "Shaft! Can ya dig it? They say that cat Shaft is one bad mutha, shut yo mouth! I'm just talkin' about Shaft."_

"I did not!" Leo exclaimed, standing in protest. He couldn't believe that Donnie would say something so…wrong. The other three just shrugged, unable to discount Donnie's version.

"That's it?" Raph asked, hoping Donnie still had more to tell.

"Well," Donnie said. "After we made sure Leo was okay, you went after the…killer and…overreacted." At his older brother's menacing growl, Donnie cringed slightly. "Though I can easily sight that under the strain of the day and Leo's subsequent drugging caused you to react on adrenaline and emotional stress."

Raph grunted, but was quiet.

"That's it?" Mikey complained. "That's not _even_ what happened!"

"Okay Mikey," Leo placated. "Why don't you tell us what _you_ saw?"

"Are you kidding me?" asked Raph.

"You're just mad cause you know my version is the one we're going with," Mikey strutted. "Here's what _really_ went down…"


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Wow! I usually don't do author notes throughout, but I have to say I am amazed and honored at the response I've gotten so far for this. For everyone who's reviewed, added me to their story & author alerts, and adding me to favorites...THANK YOU!

Here's the so anticipated Mikey's version and I have to admit, this is my favorite chapter as well. I don't want to give anything away, so I will place disclaimers at the END of the fic. Also, for anyone who has seen Madagascar/Penguins of... just think of the leader penguin (Skipper) when you get to Leo. That's all I'm gonna say.

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**Chapter III**

_A mutant turtle named Michelangelo awoke one morning, knowing it was gonna be a special day. For some reason, he awoke with a smile on his face and a song in his heart. Well, the song was actually from Spongebob Squarepants, but it seemed like the perfect theme for the day._

_"Mr. Sun came up and he smiled at me!" the turtle began, picking up his orange cat that had been nestled next to him in slumber. "He said 'it's gonna be a good one, just wait and see'!" Placing his confused cat back on his bed, Mikey jumped out, landing on the floor below with a dramatic pose. "Jumped outta bed, wiped the sleep out of my eyes."_

_Heading for his door, he stopped halfway, caught in the ever persistent problem of remembering the next verse of a song. This was of course Michelangelo. What he couldn't figure out, he improvised. "Something something, gotta work on my thighs! It's the best day everrrrrrrr!" Throwing open his door, the turtle dubbed as the youngest got a head start on his day._

"Leo was practicing like a freak monkey," Mikey continued, ignoring the indignant look his eldest brother tossed his way. "I passed Raphie on the way to get some food, Donnie was type type typing away in his room and finally, I was in the kitchen." He paused before saying, "I know cause I was there."

_If there was one thing Mikey loved about mornings, it was making breakfast. Well, for Mikey there was of course differences in mornings. During the week when their sensei made them practice at the ungodly hour of six am was a kinda depressing morning; Saturday mornings were of course the best as it meant half a morning of cartoons with Spiderman, the Justice League, and the ultra cute Chemically Enhanced Fighting Rabbits; and of course, of course, there was Christmas morning. No better time in the year or world._

_This morning was made for making breakfast for everyone and he was getting such a vibe for pancakes, it was nuts. Popping on the radio for his morning rituals, Mikey began setting up the stuff to make his world famous pancakes. On an even better note, his brother Donatello must've been listening to the radio last as it was tuned to an 80's station. If there was one thing that tied Mikey closest to his brothers, it was his music habits. He was an eclectic kinda guy – he loved just about everything from classic rock and roll oldies to disco to metal to country. That was the only reason Donnie and Raph let him into the garage on occasion – he made the best mix CDs._

_His older brother Leo, though into some Japanese relaxation plinging and hard core classical freak, was a closeted raver. Well, Mikey thought he was. There was something to be said when you find a house mix tape in your straight laced brother's bedroom. Not that Leo or anyone knew he had been in there, but that alone made the younger turtle want to do something special for him. Like make a mix CD full of trance and house music. Yeah. That should get some forgiving for what he had done to his Mozart CD._

_Suddenly, the younger turtle perked up as he heard the opening to a fave 80's song of his. "You put the boom boom into my heart," Mikey sang along, doing little dances as he made pancakes. "You send my soul sky high when your lovin' starts. You do the Jitterbug into my brain. Goes a bang bang bang 'til my feet do the same."_

"So while I'm making pancakes and listening to the radio, this new report comes on, right?"

_"Good morning, New York!" cried the radio announcer. "Things are looking good outside, sunny with some windy clouds. Temps are dropping as the state starts to ease into winter. Make sure you get your sweaters and coats, tonight's a balmy 57 with a high of 69."_

_"Hot," Mikey whispered._

_"Gonna take a quickie for the news today. Here's Lisa to tell you the haps in the city. Lisa?"_

_"Thanks John," replied a female voice. "Hey out there, New York!"_

_"Hellooooooo Lisa!" exclaimed the turtle._

_"Got a couple of top news stories today. In global, the president has sent…"_

_Mikey's brain instantly shut its doors to the plight of the world at large. It wasn't that Mikey didn't care about peace talks or those needing help in other countries; it was just there wasn't anything he really could do. He wasn't accepted in his own fair city of Manhattan, much less accepted in other countries. But, he reasoned, doing good and doing the right thing still weighed in at the end of the night. Think of all the people he and his brothers had saved from muggers, rapists, Purple Dragons, and crazy Bishop alien rejects; not to mention the people they saved from Raphael's temper._

_"…police are still baffled at a recent mystery involving a few homeless people."_

_That got the brain's attention._

_"Authorities say it began about a few weeks ago when a homeless man was found dead in an alley off of McArthur Park," Lisa continued. "While in custody, the man's body mysteriously disappeared. Police are now saying at least three more cases of these peculiar body snatchings have happened lately. Thus far, they have no leads or suspects. If anyone…"_

_Mikey quickly turned off the radio and began thinking. Dead bodies just didn't get up and walk away. Well, not unless they were zombies. Holy halibut! Zombies were running around the city and using their homeless friends as their vehicles of carnage. "Egads!" he cried. "This looks like a job for the Turtle brothers!"_

"Egads?" Donnie asked, looking at his younger brother. "You actually expect us, expect _me_ to believe you not only used the word 'egads' but know it's meaning?"

"Dude," Mikey whined. "Trying to tell a story here."

"More like making one up," Raph muttered.

"Anyway," the younger turtle continued. "The whole thing got me worried, you know, about the Professor and stuff. So of course I went out to get Leo and Raph."

_"Hey Raphie!" Mikey cried, running out into the living room and spotting his older brother on the couch. "Big trouble in little Manhattan, yo. Some ghoulish creep is stealing the bodies of our homeless homies!"_

_The turtle brother in red turned quickly to stare at his baby brother. Friends…hurt? "Raph smash!" he exclaimed, punching his fist in one hand._

_"Yeah!"_

_"What's all the hub bub, bubs?" Leo asked, appearing next to them suddenly._

_"Zombies!" Mikey exclaimed. "Evil doers are turning our friends into mindless, human eating machines!"_

_"My God, man!" Leo replied. "Do you know what this means?"_

_"Raph smash!"_

_"Not quite yet, Raphael," the leader remarked. "First, we need to get to the scene of the crime. Raphael, go get Donatello. Michelangelo, call our esteemed friend, the Professor. I want to learn more about this menace."_

_Raph got up, grumbling the whole time before opening his brainy brother's door._

_"Yes?"_

_Raph grunted._

_"Really?" answered Donatello. "You do know that zombies don't exist right?"_

_The turtle only grunted and snorted more._

_"Fascinating," replied the engineer. "And how did these zombies come to be?"_

_Raphael just screamed._

_"Alright, alright," Donnie soothed. "No need to get your dander up. I'm sure we just need to investigate and things will be fine."_

_"Raph smash!"_

_"Indeed."_

"If I say, 'Raph smash' again in this story," Raph threatened.

"So, we all piled in the Battle Shell and headed for that doctor chick's office."

_"I'm so glad you could come," replied Nurse Juliene Duffy, as the turtles walked in the door. "I wasn't sure what to do."_

_"No worries, my good lady," Leonardo responded, his voice taking on an odd mix of Capt. Kirk from Star Trek and Charlton Heston. "We will do our best to get to the bottom of these dastardly deeds before you can say abomination five times fast."_

_"That's fast work," the nurse breathed in awe._

_"We're fast turtles."_

_"This the body here?" Mikey asked, throwing off the white sheet that covered it. "Alas poor man, we knew ye well."_

_Raph snorted. _

_"Well, yes, you're right," Mikey amended. "We didn't really know him, but if we did, he would still be a poor man. But he'd also be a stylish man."_

_"Donatello, analysis."_

_"It would seem, Leo, that this man did not die of ordinary circumstances," Donatello intoned._

_"That's what I was thinking, too," Jules mentioned._

_The brainy turtle picked up the man's arm. "See here?" he said. "Bite mark on the forearm."_

_"Fascinating," Mikey replied._

_"Indeed," answered his brother._

_Raph grunted._

_"The shoelaces?" Leo asked. "What about them?"_

_Raph grunted again._

_"Hmmm," their leader murmured. "Perhaps you're right, Raphael."_

_Raph grunted once more. Mikey suddenly snapped his fingers. "Of course!" he exclaimed. "Good thinking, Raphie. We need to find the nearest cemetery. That may hold the key to our present mystery here."_

_Raph snorted, then grunted._

_"An autopsy?" Donnie asked. "Donatello doesn't want to do an autopsy! Donatello doesn't even know **how** to do an autopsy!"_

_Raph sputtered before making a fist and hitting it into his hand._

_"You're right," the brainy turtle gulped. "No time like the present to learn. But Donatello still protests! Donatello is not happy! Donatello…"_

"Is wondering why I'm speaking in the third person?" Donnie interrupted. "I mean, is there a reason for me to be speaking in the third person?"

"Yes."

There was a pause before Donnie rolled his eyes and asked, "And that reason would be?"

"Because it's my story," Mikey huffed. "We left Don Don here with the zombie corpse and headed out with Jules to the cemetery, which was only a few blocks away."

_It was always a risk for the turtles to be out at any time of day, but especially daylight day, as anyone could see them. Sitting or rather crouching in the back of Jules' SUV at least allowed them to look around the cemetery without real notice._

_"Um…" the nurse stuttered. "Tell me again why we're here."_

_"Simple, my good woman," Leo began. "Raphael here has a hunch as to where we may find our elusive killer, because despite what my younger and more handsome brother Michelangelo may think, there are no zombies."_

_"I beg to differ, big bro," Mikey insisted. "This guy, whoever he is, is making zombies out of our friends. Maybe we shouldn't have left Donnie alone with the body. It only takes a few hours before zombification sets in."_

_"Smash!"_

_"It's too early for a good smashing, brother of mine," Leo said. "But don't you worry. By the end of this, there will be smashing of the unjust villains who dare taint our city with their foul stench of evil."_

"Are you kidding me?" Leo asked. "I never said that! I have never said that!"

"Dude, in the middle of a story," Mikey said. "So we sat out in the car, in a cemetery for like forever. That's when we saw the pizza guy…"

_Raph grunted suddenly, ducking himself and the others out of view._

_"Hey Jules!" they heard from outside._

_"Hey Bobby!" They heard the sound of another car drive off before they picked their heads out again. "That was Bobby Lawless," Jules replied. "He's one of the delivery drivers for a local pizza place."_

_Raph grunted._

_"I believe you are correct, sir," Leo replied. "Who would order pizza at such a time in the morning?"_

_"Hungry people?" Mikey joked._

_Leo laughed, loud and heartily. "Oh Michelangelo," he chuckled. "You are a card! Your delightful humor has always been a source of entertainment for as long as we've known you."_

"This is ridiculous," Raph muttered, turning to look at Leo. "You're just gonna let him continue this, are you?"

"At least you don't sound like Charlton Heston," his brother whispered back.

"Anyway," Mikey continued. "Jules drops us off and we make it back here. Raph says he's gonna meet up with Casey and that left me and Leo. So Leo gets the idea to scope out some info. So he arranges this meeting with Karai…"

"He did what?"

Leo gulped as two of his brothers were now looking at him. "We needed information!" he defended. "And who else are we gonna go to? Hun? At least with Karai, we have insight into not only the Foot, but the Purple Dragons too."

"Do…do you not remember what that little skank has done to us?" Raph asked, angrily.

"I remember quite well, thank you," Leo growled. "It was the only way. And besides," he continued, glaring at Mikey. "It was _supposed_ to be a _secret_ meeting."

"So Leo gets this 'secret meeting' with Karai about a block away from Jules' office…"

_The city of Manhattan, though sometimes dangerous at night, had never looked more beautiful. This was his life, their life, and one they lead without most complaints. It was here, on a rooftop only a few blocks from the office of Juliene Duffy, that the turtles known as Leonardo and Michelangelo awaited for the appearance of Karai, once leader of the notorious Foot Clan._

_Leonardo must have felt the trepidation that wafted off his brother, for he turned and said, "Do not be afraid, little one, for I…am Leonardo. Your leader. I shall protect you within an inch…of my life."_

_"You gotta admit, big bro," Mikey said. "This is bad mojo, man. Anything can happened, especially with Karai."_

_"Do you doubt your leader?"_

"Mikey…"

"Hold on, hold on."

_Like the ninja she was, Oroku Karai appeared from nowhere, landing a few feet from them. It was like Mikey wasn't even there, as both Karai and Leonardo only seemed to have eyes for each other. _

_"Leonardo."_

_"Karai."_

_"Mikey!" the turtle cried, looking between them._

_"You take a big risk asking me to meet you," the Japanese woman replied, sauntering over to the older turtle._

_"You take a big risk for meeting me here," the turtle replied, walking towards his contact._

_They were so close together, you could break them apart with a crowbar. "You are still the same, Leonardo," the woman whispered, sultry._

_"And you …are…beautiful."_

"Hey!" Leo cried, blushing profusely.

"Mikey, your story just got interesting," Raph chuckled.

"What else do you do at these 'secret meetings'?" Donnie asked Leo, a huge grin on his face.

"You change that right now!" Leo insisted, standing and lunging for Mikey, who screamed and jumped out of the way. "You change it and tell it right!"

"So the air was all thick and tense and sexual frustration and stuff…"

"What!?"

_"I came looking for information," he said, with his Spanish accent._

_Turning, Karai leaned against him dramatically. "I see," she whispered. "So you just want information from me. Nothing else?"_

_Leonardo turned her back towards him before whispering, "Come. Let us dance under the pale moonlight."_

"Alright," Leo stated, pointing an angry finger at his younger brother. "That's it. Now you're just being obnoxious, Mikey. You tell this story right or I'll…I'll tell Master Splinter who broke his reading lamp."

Mikey's eyes got wide. "You wouldn't!"

"Oh, just try me," the eldest grinned, menacingly.

Mikey suddenly remembered where Raph got his evil tendencies from. "Fine," he sighed. "Karai told us that she had also heard about the body snatchings and that the Foot had been seeing strange things at this little RV Park on the outskirts."

"Sounds like the place Case and me were at," Raph replied.

"Skipping ahead, we get this call from Donnie that he got us a pizza…"

_"You believe what Karai said," Mikey asked, as he and Leo came to the junction they were meeting Angel at. "About the Foot seeing weird stuff at night."_

_"You can only believe what you want to about Karai," Leo replied. "She's double crossed us before, but that's where Raph and Donnie come in."_

_"Right," Mikey nodded. "But at least we can think on a full stomach. That pizza's gonna taste so good. Hey, you think Karai's lost weight? She was looking kinda toned. Think she works out a lot? I mean, you know, with the Foot all quiet."_

_"She has a nice ass."_

"Mikey!"

_The two sat and waited before a familiar figure with purple and black hair was in their vision. "I know why you were named Angel," Mikey said, hopping up and taking the pizza box from the girl. "Cause you fell from heaven to make all my dreams come true."_

_The teenager giggled. "Oh you!"_

_"Here Leo," the younger turtle said, passing the box to his brother. "Be a dear and deliver that to our brethren. I think I should walk the lovely Angel safety back to her car."_

"And, to make a long story short,"

"Too late," came three replies.

"I walk Angel back and that's when I get the call that Leo's being eaten by a zombie," Mikey stated. "So of course I hurried over. Saw Leo, saw the zombie, made sure Leo was cool, and then saw Raph go all Rambo and chase the guy down. And you know," He made a stabbing motion. "Goes all Texas Chainsaw on the guy."

"That's what you're gonna tell Master Splinter?" Raph asked.

"You think you can do better?" asked Leo.

Raphael stood up, before looking his older brother in the eye. "You're damn right," he growled. "The morning started like any normal day. I got up and sat myself down in front of the tower for a little educational television…"

* * *

DISCLAIMER - TMNT is copyrighted and owned by Laird, Eastman, and MIrage Studios; X Files are the porperty of 20th Century Fox; Spongebob Squarepants and the song "Best Day Ever" are properties of Nickelodeon Studios; The song, "Wake me up (before you go go)" is copyrighted to WHAM!/George Michael; Captain Kirk and all parodies are properties of Gene Roddenberry; and Charleton Heston is a property amongst himself. This story is intended for entertainment purposes with no money being made from it.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Chapter IV_**

"_Yeah!" _

_Raphael, the turtle mostly known for his ill temperament, found himself enjoying last night's wrestling for a morning treat. He had been nice and let Donnie check out something on the Discovery Channel, as long as he got to record his wrestling match. He so loved DVR. The day had been going fairly well – he had woken earlier than normal, but he didn't feel especially tired. Mikey was singing and jabbering away in the kitchen making breakfast, Leo was training himself to death, again, and though he had no idea what it was Donnie did in his room all morning, there were pros and cons to it. Cons as he thought spending all of one's time on the computer was unhealthy, but pros, it did get him videos he may never be able to buy and of course, the DVR. Sometimes, his little brother amazed him._

_Not that he would ever tell him that._

_The normalcy of the day was broken in that moment, by Michelangelo, of course._

"_Holy halibuts, Batman!" the younger turtle cried, running into the living room like a maniac. "Zombies have taken over the world! Oh Lordy, Lordy! What we gonna do?"_

"_First," Raph replied, turning around to look at his younger brother. "You're going to calm down and talk right. Secondly, what the shell are you talking about?"_

"_I heard it on the news, Raph," Mikey sputtered, breathing heavily as though he just ran a marathon. "Zombies! Eating people. We're doomed!"_

"_What's he screaming about?" Leo asked, looking at Mikey._

"_Something about zombies."_

"_Zombies?" The ringing of the main line caused Leo to make a wide berth around his hyperventilating brother in order to answer. "Hey Professor," Leo answered, before his face took on a thoughtful look. "That's weird. Yeah, I'll let them know. Well…we'll see. Bye." Heading back to the couch, the leader replied, "That was the Professor. Apparently there have been a rash of…body snatchings lately, all of dead homeless people."_

"_That's not right," Raph said, jumping off the couch and heading towards Donnie's room. "I'll get Donnie, you start up the Battle Shell."_

"_For what?"_

"_We're hunting us some zombies," Raph said, huge grin on his face._

"_Right now!?" Leo asked. "But…but…it's all…light and stuff outside. And…and…you know what Master Splinter says. The light is our enemy and it's scary and…and scary stuff happens."_

"_When did you become the baby?" the red branded turtle asked, turning to knock and then open his little brother's door. "Hey Don," he said. "Sorry to bother, but how'd you like to go zombie chasing with us?"_

"_Right now?" the turtle whined. "But it's only nine and that's Don Don time!"_

"_It's the Professor," Raph started. "Some of the guys look to be in real trouble."_

_Donnie sighed dramatically. "Fine!" he huffed. "Not like __**I **__wanted to something or anything today."_

"_Well, hey buddy," his brother perked. "We can stop by the junkyard on the way back. Get ya something nice."_

"_Promise?"_

"_Yeah. Now, come on. Zombies wait for no man."_

"So we hop in the Battle Shell and cruise over to that Jules chick's place…"

_A busty woman greeted them as they walked in. Raph nodded to the Professor, who shook Donnie's hand before motioning towards the nurse, one Juliene Duffy. "I'm so glad you could come," she replied, her voice deep and seductive. Raph had to admit the girl was cute, though he wasn't really into red heads. Reminded him of April too much; however he could clearly see the spell had been cast on his two younger brothers. "I found him," the woman sighed. "And I didn't know what to do and…I wondered who would protect me."_

"_I will," Donnie said, moving closer to the nurse._

"_I will," Mikey replied, also moving closer to the nurse._

"_No thank you," Leo said, politely. "Is this the body?"_

"_Yes," Jules breathe, removing the white sheet. "He's just as I found him."_

"_Oooh!" Mikey exclaimed, seeing the shirt the homeless man wore. "Fancy!"_

"_You haven't done nuttin to him?" Raph asked, looking over the body casually._

"_No," Jules said. "The Professor thought it best to wait. You know how those horrid officers of the law are. They'd just go traipsing through my office and putting their dirty hands in my drawers."_

_Two of four turtles looked at the woman in stunned silence. "I'd like to go through your drawers," Donnie whispered, completely entranced. "Files! I meant files. I was thinking files."_

"_I wasn't," Mikey grinned._

"_At first I thought he may have died a natural death," Jules began. "But I couldn't find any outward signs that would confirm that. And then, I found this." She held up the man's arm and the four were surprised to find a large bite mark and some of the man's flesh was gone._

"_Case closed," Mikey nodded. "Zombie."_

"_Forgive him," Donnie chuckled. "He's an idiot. It's clear to me that we're dealing with some nutjob, who just happens to think he's a zombie by exhibiting cannibalistic tendencies. Zombies aren't real."_

"_I beg to differ there, bro," Raph said. "There are several types of zombies, though not in the movie sense that everyone is probably thinking. People in Haiti have always believed and even used some form of black magic or voodoo in practice. There are some types of drugs that will induce the appearance, if you will, of someone as a zombie. Legends have gone as far back as ancient centuries where people believe you could bring back the dead. Isn't that, after all, what Frankenstein is based on?"_

Leo looked at his immediate younger brother. "It disturbs me that you know so much about that," he said, raising an eye ridge.

"_If there's a point Raphael," Donnie said, smiling at Jules. "Please feel free to make it."_

"_My point," Raph stressed. "Is that while we may be actually dealing with some sort of zombie outlet, it's probably a mere case of someone wanting or believing themselves to be a zombie, by eating people's flesh. Gross, I know, but…" the turtle trailed off as he noticed the state of the man's shoes. "You said you brought him in just the way you found him?" he asked, to which both the Professor and Jules nodded. "Then why are his shoelaces untied?"_

"That's been mentioned in every retelling," Donnie interrupted. "Why exactly are his shoelaces important?"

"Getting to that," Raph said, continuing. "So while we left you to do an autopsy, the three of us and Jules went to the cemetery."

"_Why are we at a cemetery?" Mikey asked, quivering in the back._

"_Mikey, you should know," Raph said, taking a look out the window. "Zombies, like vampires, have a special bond with cemeteries. It's a likely place for them to gather if need be."_

"_Oh geez! Oh geez!" Leo fretted. "We're out in the open, anyone can see us. Oh, God what was that?"_

"_Why are cemeteries important?" Jules asked. "It's just full of icky dead people."_

"_Right on, sister!" Mikey exclaimed._

"_In cultures that believe in the thought of zombies," Raph began. "It's typical for them to have their start right here, in a cemetery. The ritual is to have the newly deceased rise from the grave. We may not be able to get anything during the day, but I just have a feeling that our killer is going to visit here at some point."_

"That's when that Bobby Lawless guy showed up outta nowhere," Raph continued. "I mean, seriously. Who orders a pizza at like nine thirty in the morning?"

"Raph?" Leo asked. "The shoelaces?"

"I'm gittin' there, I'm gittin' there," the red branded turtle replied. "So we headed back here and I thought it would be a perfect time to hit the streets."

_They were in the sewers heading home when the idea struck Raph. "Hey," he said, stopping his two brothers. "Idea. I'll call Casey and we'll hit the streets, see if anyone knows something about this. You two see what you can find."_

"_But…but…" Leo whined. "It's cold and I'm frightened and the Foot are after me!"_

"_Oh for the love of…" Raph complained, rolling his eyes. "You got Mikey!" His older brother just looked at him. "Alright," he sighed. Pulling out a string with some bottle caps on them, he held it in front of their baby brother. "Hey Mikey!" he said, sounding excited. "Look! Look! Want it? Huh? You want the shiny things? Yeah? Go get it!" He tossed the bottle cap string off in the distance and watched as Mikey frantically ran to fetch them._

"_There," Raph replied. "That should buy you some time. Think of something, Fearless."_

"So while I left Mikey and Leo in the sewers, I hit up my man Casey Jones."

"_Hey Raphie," Casey Jones asked, his head turning this way and that. "Why'd you bring me to a cemetery? This ain't the way to win my heart, you know?"_

"_Shut up," Raph growled. "We're looking for any disturbed graves or headstones."_

"_Again, why?"_

"_Typically zombies start here," Raph continued. "In a cemetery. We're gonna either find evidence of someone coming back to life or someone trying to do a ritual of bringing someone back to life."_

"_Raph, man," Casey sighed, shaking his head. "You know it's creepy that you know so much about zombies."_

"_I ain't a little chicken shit like Mikey," the red turtle huffed. "I can actually make it through zombie movies. And despite what Donnie thinks, I actually __**do**__ listen to him and whatever he's watching on the History Channel." Stopping in conversation, Raph pulled out a small plastic bag and began throwing the contents on the ground._

"_The fuck, man?"_

"_Zombies are like any horror monster," Raph said, continuing to throw out what looked like paper clips. "Though closer to vampires for their nocturnal noshes, you know? One thing that's true though is that zombies are OCD. Throw paper clips at them, they gotta stop to pick them up. They see a knot, they gotta undo it. That's what I think happened with our dead guy too." The ringing of Raph's shell cell caused the two to jump slightly. Answering, Raph said, "Speak."_

"_Raphael?"_

"_Sup, Professor."_

"_I hope you'll forgive the intrusion, dear boy," the homeless man replied. "I just talked to Donatello and he thought you might be of some assistance."_

"_What's the dealio?"_

"_A couple of vagrants were near that abandoned RV park on the edge of town," the Professor said. "They say there's a runaway car down there. They weren't sure what to make of it."_

"_No worries, Case and I are on it."_

"So Casey and I hit that RV park and see this trailer just spinnin' outta control."

"_Someone's a bad driver," Casey joked._

"_Funny."_

"_Whatcha thinkin'?" asked the vigilante. "Knock the tires out?"_

_Pulling a few shurikens from his side, Raph grinned. "Let's do this."_

"Skipping ahead…"

"Well, wait," Donnie said. "Why skip ahead?"

"Yeah, Raphie," egged on Mikey. "What happened when you got to the RV park?"

It was clear that something so profound had happened to make Raphael hesitant to talk about what happened. "FYI, alright," he muttered. "Shooting the tires out on a moving trailer is a lot harder than you would think. So me and Casey tried a different approach…"

_This was probably the dumbest and reckless idea he'd ever had. And Hamato Raphael knew dumb ideas – his brother Mikey was full of them – he even knew a thing or two about being reckless. Hell, he hung out with Casey on a regular basis. It was expected of them to be a bit reckless and dumb. But this…well, trying to stop a runaway trailer by hanging on the back of it wasn't the smartest thing they had ever done. _

_If he came back with so much as a scratch, Donnie would kill him._

"Finally it stopped. And of course, when we go inside to check things out, we see another body. This one was by far the worst, cause there were just bite marks everywhere it seemed. How this guy got into this car, I don't know, but I knew it was something important. So, heading back home, I was achey and tired and kinda hungry cause I skipped lunch and then dinner I guess. Well, anyway, there's when I ran into Donnie…"

"_Whadda mean I gotta do another autopsy!?" the brainy turtle exploded. Raphael had stumbled with dignity into his brother's lab and had a seat on one of the tables. His brother had obviously been holding out on them as he was comfortably seated in a nice, black massage chair. Well, he had been comfortable until Raph told him about the body they discovered._

"_I was on my feet all day doing an autopsy!" the rant continued. "I do this stuff all for you guys, Raph! I haven't even eaten yet! I had like one cup of coffee and a piece of toast with butter for breakfast! And it wasn't even real butter! It was like lite butter that didn't even taste like butter and then stupid Mikey drank my creamer, so I didn't even get my Irish Cream in my coffee. And Irish Cream is always saved for special days of Don Don!"A small pause. "What the hell happened to you?"_

"Eventually, you left."

"_And don't touch my chair!"_

"I think I may have fallen asleep, cause the next thing I know, Donnie's calling me and saying the killer is after Leo. So I get my bike and hurry over, you know? I get there, throw out a couple of shuriken that missed and take after the guy," Raph took a breath before continuing. "I could see it as he went past that he had blood around his mouth. So I went after him and…yeah."

"There's a whole load of information everyone has skipped over," Leo replied, shaking his head.

"Okay big brother," Donnie said, crossing his arms over his plastron. "You've heard our stories. What about yours?"

"Yeah!"

"Alright," Leo began. "As you've all mentioned, Master Splinter had given us a free day prior to his departure. However, even with our new found hiatus, that doesn't mean we need to forgo our training. I had gotten up early in order to practice…"


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Hey oh! Sorry for the bit of lateness. I tried getting this out during the weekend, but a _certain_ site had their download manager down, so I was unable. Cause of that, here are two chapters for you! Thanks again for the reviews, everyone!

* * *

**_Chapter V_**

_The morning's meditation had helped the young turtle named Leonardo, for it gave him the ability to block out the sound of his brother's off key singing and the yelling that came from the TV. While he knew his father and sensei would want him to take the time to relax, Leo just couldn't find it in him to let this day go without at least an hour of practice time._

_His pursuit of perfection had dwindled somewhat after the last brush with the Utrom Shredder, Oroku Saki. Though they had won, it was a hard cost; if the Utroms hadn't found them, he, his brothers, and father wouldn't be there today. It had felt like a defeat for him, though after all the time, Leo had come to conclusion it was Karai's betrayal that had stung the most. It had finally told him that…whatever he had hoped for was not to be, not when she blindly followed the Shredder with no questions asked._

_She had brought up the point once – wouldn't Leo do the same if put in her position? The first answer was no, because Master Splinter had raised them with honor, but isn't that Saki had done for Karai? Twisted honor, yes, but enough of it to instill in Karai a hard balancing act that the elder turtle could not follow her in. _

_Sudden screaming nearly halted the turtle in his thoughts and movement, though his first thought was just to ignore whatever was happening. It was probably just Raph chasing Mikey again. However, when he didn't hear the characteristic growling from his immediate younger brother, he went to investigate. Behind the couch stood Mikey, who was – in a word – flailing his arms in an agitated manner; on the couch sat Raph, who was looking at their brother as if this was a normal thing at nine o'clock in the morning. Which, to some extent, it was._

_"Mikey, what's wrong?" Leo asked, trying to get an answer to this odd behavior._

_"Zombies, Leo!" Mikey screamed. "Taking over our planet. Call the president! Call the Coast Guard!"_

_"Call a doctor," Raph muttered. "Cause you are clearly certifiable at this point."_

_"Why is he crying about zombies?"_

_"Don't listen to him," Raph said, waving off their hysterical younger brother. "It's like that time he heard coughing was an effect of bird flu and he thought he had caught it. He heard something on the radio, now he thinks zombies are taking over the world."_

"That's when the Professor called, asking for our assistance."

_"That was the Professor," Leo replied, after hanging up the main phone line. "Seems Mike's news story isn't nutty after all. He says he's over at that Juliene Duffy's office. Raph, go get Don and we can see what he thinks."_

_"Right." Raph got up from the couch and went over to Donnie's door. Instead of knocking, the burly turtle just kicked the door down. "Hey!" he called inside. "We're gonna catch us some zombies. You in?"_

_"But it's Don Don time!" came the answer, however the brainy turtle was lured from his natural habitat and met the others in the living room. "What?" he whined._

_"A simple knock would've sufficed," the leader admonished._

_"Fuck that," Raph replied. "I got him out, didn't I?"_

_The elder sighed before continuing. "There's trouble," Leo said. "The Professor thinks the homeless may be in danger. He wants us to speak with that nurse whose been giving them medical care lately."_

_"Sweet!" exclaimed Raph. "Let's go!"_

_"Hold up, bro," Leo replied. "I didn't mean right now. It's light outside and you know what Master Splinter says about…"_

_"Shut up, mailbox head!" the temperamental turtle said. "It's ninja time!"_

"Mailbox head?" Raph asked, not sure if he should be insulted or amused. "I've never called you 'mailbox head', but hell, if you want me to…"

"Anyway," Leo interrupted. "Despite my judgment to the contrary, we took the Battle Shell out to Juliene Duffy's. There we met with the Professor and…"

_"Hi again, boys!" called the nurse, whose teeth seemed to be larger than her face when she smiled._

"Big, buck teeth?" Mikey asked, stunned.

"She has a slight overbite," Leo replied.

"She does not!" Raph argued.

"How is that relevant?" asked Donnie.

"I'm just trying to be thorough," Leo said, calmly. "The three of _you_ had been preoccupied as you missed a crucial important fact that tied these deaths together."

_"Are you saying you've been able to get a hold of two other victims?" Leo asked, surprised._

_Jules nodded. "They always seem to be around here," she said. "I gotta tell ya, Leonardo, I've been a mite scared with these bodies up popping up, that's why I've asked the Professor to come and help me during the day."_

_Looking over at the table, where the body lay with a sheet over it, Leo asked, "No exam's been done?"_

_"Oh, no sir," the nurse replied, demurely. "The Professor and I thought it be better if we waited for y'all in case you find something of importance."_

_"No exam's been done?" Donnie asked, dreamily._

_Taking the sheet off the body, Leo looked the man over once, trying to see anything out of the ordinary. "And he's just the way you found him?" he asked._

_"Uh huh."_

_"Guys…"_

_"You're pretty," Mikey replied, gazing at the nurse._

_"What's your sign?" Donnie asked._

_"Are you doing anything Saturday night?" asked Raph._

_"Guys!" Leo called. He held up the man's arm. "What do you make of it, Donnie?"_

_"Someone did not finish his meal," the brainy turtle joked. "Obviously, we're dealing with a freaky deaky who likes cannibalism. I'm sure he came across our friend here and thought he'd take a 'bite' outta crime. Get it?"_

_"You're as bad as Mikey."_

_"Well, I'm sorry!" Donnie huffed. "I don't plan my days for corpse watching, you know. I have a game program that's just sitting at home, sitting and doing nothing!"_

_"Priorities, Donnie!"_

_"Hey!" Raph exclaimed, pointing to the man's shoes. "Someone untied this guy's shoes."_

_"So what?" asked Jules._

_"So what?" the red branded turtle started. "That's a clue, yo! To what, I have no idea, but I know a clue when I fucking see one! Quickly, to a nearby cemetery!" With that, Raph walked away towards the door, but not without kicking it down for his exit._

"Okay, seriously bro," Raph replied. "I don't just randomly go around kicking doors down. I do have manners you know."

"Anyway, Raph, Mikey, and I went with Jules to the cemetery to check things out."

_"Thanks for giving us a ride out here," Leo replied, sitting in the back of Jules' SUV. "We normally don't wander around during the day."_

_"I'm bored!" Mikey whined._

_"Shut up, Meatwad!" Raph scolded. "There's a zombie around here. I can feel it."_

_"I don't like zombies," Mikey huffed._

_"Raph," Leo asked. "Why was it that we came here to the cemetery?"_

_"Graves, Leo," Raph murmured. "Graves and tons of them. If there's a zombie in town, this'll be the first place he'll come to."_

_"Shh!" Leo had heard a noise and now he could recognize it was a car coming down the road from where they were. "Hide!"_

_"Hey Jules!"_

_"Hey Bobby!"_

_Once the leader felt the cost was clear, he gave the signal for his brothers to come out. "Was that a fucking pizza guy?" asked Raph._

_"That was Bobby Lawless," Jules replied. "He works as a delivery driver for one of the local pizza places."_

_"You thinkin' what I'm thinkin', bro?"_

_"Who's ordering pizza at nine in the morning?" Leo answered._

_"Know what I'm thinking?" asked Mikey._

_"If magic beans are real?"_

_"No!" the younger turtle protested. "Well, yeah, but this time I was thinking how yummy it would be to have pizza right now. Ya dig?"_

_"I'll dig a fucking hole for you in that fucking cemetery if you don't shut the fuck up!"_

"Dude, fuck isn't even my favorite word," Raph complained. "I have a wide variety of alternate words I can use."

"We left the cemetery with the assistance of Jules and began to head back here," Leo continued, ignoring his younger brother. "That's when Raph had his idea about meeting with Casey."

_"Bye."_

_"Wait," Leo asked. "Where are you going?"_

_"To Casey's."_

_"Don't you think we should concentrate on the situation at hand?"_

_Raph rolled his eyes at his older brother. "Hello!" he sighed. "What do you think I'm doin'? We need to get info and what better way than to bash the heads in of some fucking Purple Dragon scum!"_

_"Raph, I don't think that's such a good idea," Leo stated. "It's still light outside and if what we think is true, there's some homicidal killer on the loose. What we should be doing is watching over the Professor and our friends."_

_"Shut up, Leo!" Raph growled. "You're just a scaredy baby. What? You think zombies don't have any honor?"_

_"Well, they don't," Mikey spoke up. "I mean, with the bitin' and the yellin' and you know. They can be rude."_

_"Raphael, this is no time to go off half cocked," the leader insisted. "At least wait until Donnie comes back with some findings!"_

_"Time waits for no man or turtle, Leo," Raph whispered. "While you and Mary Poppins here sit around waitin', me and Case are gonna get to the bottom of this. If I get eaten by a zombie, you'll be the first to know. Bye."_

_Leo shook his head in frustration. "What is it about me that makes him have to do the opposite of what I say?" he asked, rhetorically._

_"Youth, my dear turtle," Mikey replied. "Youth. Anyway, I'm bored."_

"That's when I decided that Raph's approach was a good idea."

"I'm so glad it didn't hurt to admit that," Raph muttered.

"So I called Karai."

"Wait," Donnie said. "You _called_ Karai? You have her number?"

Leo fidgeted for a bit. "I may…have her on speed dial," he murmured.

"Are you shitting me?" asked Raph, completely awed. "See? Alternate usage of a word."

"I thought it would be useful in case of an emergency!"

"What kind of emergency would we have where we'd have to call Karai?" Raph asked.

"Look," Leo sighed. "It makes more sense for me to just hit the number three on my phone and there she is. She has information that we could use, so I decided to take advantage of that fact." His brothers just looked at him, as though he had completely lost his mind. Well, all except Raph, who looked like he wanted to rip out the older turtle's mind.

"I thought I was number three on speed dial," the temperamental turtle replied.

"I…I don't…" Leo sputtered. "Look, I don't remember off the top of my head who happens to be on my phone's speed dial, okay? The point is, Karai agreed to meet with me, so we met on the roof about a few blocks from the nurse's office."

_"You take a risk calling me out here, Leonardo," the Japanese woman replied, once she saw the turtle who had so calmly and intimately called her at her home._

_"And you risk coming to meet me, Karai," the leader shot back. "I only do this for information."_

_"What could I know that would possibly interest you?"_

_"We believe there's a killer in the city," Leo began. "He's targeting the homeless, but to top that, their bodies are disappearing."_

_"And you think that I or the Foot is somehow involved?"_

_"No," he said, shaking his head. "I'm hoping that you or the Foot would have seen something, heard something."_

_"You take our truce too far, Leonardo," Karai sneered. "Why do you care so much for these people? They are homeless, without family. No one should even miss them. Why do you search for their killer?"_

_"Because that's what friends do, Karai," the turtle whispered. "They help each other."_

_The kunochi looked at the turtle sternly, though her face softened after a time. "You know I have no uses for friends," she whispered._

_"You've proven that time and again."_

_"My ninjas have noticed people in and around a trailer park on the outskirts of town," she replied. "Strange, as it appears to have closed down and been abandoned."_

_"Is it gang activity?"_

_Karai shook her head. "If the Purple Dragons had taken that as a new base," she stated. "You can be sure I would know about it. It's not much, I know, but…"_

_"It is something," Leo whispered. "For what it's worth, thank you."_

_Karai nodded. "You should go home, Leonardo," she said, a small smirk on her face. "I do not believe this late hour is well for your brother."_

_Leo turned to find Mikey leaning against an air unit, apparently sleeping. "I wondered why this conversation went so smoothly," he chuckled. Looking back at his former enemy, the turtle gave her a small nod. "Safe journeys, Karai."_

_Maybe it was wishful thinking on his part, but Leo swore he saw her blush. "And to you, Leonardo." With that, she was gone, leaving him with his thoughts and a sleeping brother._

"It wasn't much of a lead," Leo continued. "But at least we knew something was going on at that closed down RV park. Mikey and I were going to head there, when Donnie called telling us about the pizza he ordered."

_"Yes!" Mikey cried, jumping up happily. "Donnie comes through again!"_

_"I feel kinda bad though," Leo responded, as they headed to the area where they would meet the pizza guy. "Donnie sounded really tired and you know Donnie. I bet he hasn't even eaten yet."_

"We met up with Angel, who told us how she was able to get the pizza to us in the first place…"

_"You guys so owe me," the teenager said, playfully._

_"Why?" Leo asked, taking the pizza box. "What's up?"_

_"I had to practically wrestle that from the guy who was set to deliver it."_

_"Are you serious?"_

_Angel laughed. "Yeah," she said. "Guy named Bobby. New guy, started working there like a month ago or something. Got all mad cause I said I knew the guy who ordered it and wanted to surprise him. I thought he was gonna flip out."_

_"No worries, babe," Mikey said, winking at her and flexing his arm. "No need to fear when Mikey's here!"_

_Angel laughed again, used to Mikey's antics. "Well hey, Super Mikey," she giggled. "Think you can see your way to walking me to my car? Normally I wouldn't care, but I got some looks on the way over here and it's nice to have a ninja with me, you know?"_

_"Of course, m'lady!" Mikey said, bowing dramatically. "I shan't let those fiends touch one hair on that pretty, purple head of yours!"_

"Wow Mikey," Raph chuckled. "Overdoing it just a bit, don't cha think?"

"Leo's completely blowing that out of proportion," the orange clad turtle huffed, crossing his arms and trying to hide a blush. "There's nothing wrong with escorting a young woman to her car."

"I didn't get to the part where you asked her to dance in the pale moonlight," Leo sniggered.

"Oh har-de-har."

"I watched Mikey and Angel head off and headed for home myself," Leo continued. "Holding a hot pizza in your hands tends to make you hungry. That's when I realized that _I_ had missed lunch myself. So, I had a slice or two…"

_Leo had gone through nearly half of a large pepperoni, mushroom, green peppers, and olive pizza by the time he hit the streets below. He hadn't meant to, but he was hungry and unfortunately for Donnie, Leo happened to have the same tastes in pizza. This is why the pizza runs between the two of them were so easy. Heck, even Raph's meat lovers was easy to add to an order. It was Mikey who always threw the wrench in the mix._

_Landing swiftly in an alley, Leo opened the box and took out one last piece. He meant what he said to Mikey that he thought Donnie was mad for not getting his pizza and Leo wanted his little brother to eat something, especially when he had been looking at dead bodies all day long. Finishing off this last slice, the leader headed towards the manhole cover he knew was on the other side of the dumpster._

"It was there I saw the body of a man just lying on the ground," Leo stated. "Of course, I wondered if he was alright and rushed over to him."

_"Sir?" the turtle in blue asked, tentatively. "Are you okay?"_

"That's when I saw that the man's shoelaces were undone. However, by then it was too late…"

_The pizza box slipped from Leo's fingers as he stumbled against the nearby wall. Everything seemed to clear, well to a point. The killer had been here. Trying to shake the cobwebs from his head, Leo could see a nearly identical box of pizza only a few feet from where this new victim lay. Something about pizza, was the only thing Leo could think of. And if he wanted to avoid being the next victim, he needed to keep his wits about him._

_Grabbing his shell cell, he hit the first number he could read clearly. Luckily for him, it was the speed dial number for Donnie. A few rings later, his brainy brother answered, obviously not in the mood for small talk. "Can I help you with something, Leo?" came the question. Leo tried to form a sentence, shell, even a word would've been helpful, but all he could do was mutter incoherently._

_When a shadow from behind the dead man became larger, Leo could see the killer, that Bobby Lawless that he had seen earlier in the day, the one Angel had to nearly wrestle in order to get their takeout. His eyes seemed bloodshot and his face was paler than what should normally be. Leo thought he saw blood around the man's mouth and taking a quick look at the body ahead of him, there was a small, but considerable area of blood._

_He had obviously just poisoned all his victims, those who wouldn't be missed, and Leo was on the line of being the next one. Seeing Lawless, Leo tried raising an alarm, his breath hitching as he tried communicating with his brother. Surely Donatello would understand what he was saying, that he was in trouble!_

_"Good God, man," Donnie whined from the other end. "I know you like confiding in me in all things, but couldn't you have at least waited to finish the deed before you told me about it? I'm sure she thinks this is very rude!"_

"I never said that!" Donnie exclaimed.

_Leo was trying not to panic; after all, if this Bobby Lawless character knew about him, he knew about his brothers too. Hearing Donnie hang up, Leo did what he thought he could. He threw his cell at the killer. Not particularly smart, but at least it was something the turtle could do while still standing. Falling to his hands and knees, Leo groped around for anything that he could throw and hopefully distract his looming attacker. On the ground looked to be a pack of half opened, but untouched sunflower seeds. Not pretty, but he'd take it._

_Picking up the bag, Leo flung the contents out, some hitting Lawless, some hitting the ground around them and some hitting the poor unfortunate man Leo had stumbled upon. The seeds must have triggered something because Lawless grunted and sighed, before kneeling down and beginning to pick up seeds. The young man turned to look at Leo with anger in his eyes. He pointed at the turtle and growled, as if to say when he was done, Leo was in big trouble._

_As if he wasn't in trouble already._

_It was a last act of a desperate man or turtle in this case. Leo finally fell to the ground, dizzy and disorientated._

"That's when I passed out," Leo confessed. "I don't know how long I was out, but when I came to…"

_Hamato Leonardo was going to die._

_He had known of course, with the type of lifestyle they lead, this day as always a possibility. However, he had always thought he'd go down fighting, protecting his brothers, his father, and friends – his family. Never did it cross his mind that he would be snack food for a crazed zombie killer. That was something that would happen to Mikey, not Leo._

_Lawless bent over him, obviously excited about a tasty snack, when a shout from behind caught his attention. "Hey!" Both zombie and turtle looked over to see one, then two, then three other turtles blocking any escape attempt. Lawless stood, ready to take on all three, when two thuds were heard. Looking down, the zombie saw two shurikens sticking out of his chest and it seemed to just anger him._

_Growling, he leapt in the air, straight at the three turtles who had dared to attack and then block him..._

"Wait," Donnie interrupted. "You're saying we hit him with two shurikens."

Leo patted his chest. "Straight on in the chest."

"And then he flew at us…"

"Like some crazed spider monkey," Raph finished.

"Well, I…" Leo stumbled. "I wouldn't use the phrase 'crazed spider monkey' when we tell Master Splinter, but yes, that's what happened!"

The four sat or stood around the kitchen table, the time ticking faster than any of them wanted. The stories were out in the open, but all it did was present one crazy night in the life of teenage mutant ninja turtles. They knew they would have to tell the whole thing all over again to their father and teacher, without it of course sounding like they hadn't been doing drugs or drinking in his absence. "I think you should really push the fact that you were drugged," Donnie said, looking at Leo.

"Will you stop?"

"It couldn't hurt," Mikey added.

"Stop it!"

The sound of their hidden door alerted all four that their time was up. Rushing into the living room, they tried to prepare themselves for what they knew was coming. A figure entered the lair, encased in shadows, but finally taking the shape of the wise rat they had come to call father and teacher. "Ah," he said, cheerfully. "Hello, my sons."

"I was drugged!" Leo announced, causing his brothers to quickly nod at his statement.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter VI**

Master Splinter had himself a wonderful day. While he loved his four adoptive sons dearly, sometimes living with them was a headache. When he discovered there would be not only an all morning All My Children marathon and then an all afternoon Gilmore Girls treat, he knew this would be a perfect day for a vacation. So he had called up April – who being an adoptive daughter was the only one who truly understood his love of soap operas – and asked if she was aware of Gilmore Girls day.

April had of course wanted to have him over and had her husband run their antique store while they sat upstairs, laughing, crying, and ranting on the onscreen behaviors of Erica Cane and Loralei Gilmore. Splinter almost didn't go, worried that leaving four teenagers in the house would be disasterious. Who knew what they would do? Leonardo would no doubt keep up his training and watch over his siblings, but Splinter knew the teenager. Without him to entervene, who knew what Leonardo and Raphael would do if one of their daily arguments began? His younger sons always tried to stop things if they went out of hand, but Donatello hated conflict of any sort and Michelangelo felt it just as strongly.

Was Raphael going to leave the lair and stay out all night?

Would Donatello spend his entire day locked in his room or worse, his lab?

Would today be the day the older turtles destroyed Michelangelo?

While he most certainly enjoyed April's company, the parent in the elder rat couldn't stop thinking up horrible scenerios when it came to his boys. Finally, after the first three hours of AMC, he calmed himself. His sons were no longer children and really, no longer teenagers at this point. While they had always had an air of maturity (Michelangelo withstanding), they had and always would be his little boys; his babies. It didn't matter if they were going on twenty-two or ninety-two, they were his babies.

And try as he might, he couldn't stop the sigh of relief when they last episode of Gilmore Girls came to an end. April didn't try to stop him, only giggled at his state of worry. "We'll see how funny you think this is when you have four little boys of your own," he said, a slight twinkle in his eye.

"I thought I did," the red headed laughed. "Five if you count that darling husband of mine."

"You didn't have to diaper them," the ninja master replied. "Or bathe them or feed them or run around after them. If you think Donatello is curious now…and don't let me begin on how much trouble Raphael and Michelangelo caused."

"I bet Leo was a perfect angel."

Splinter snorted. "Who do you think the ringleader was?"

The old rat couldn't help smiling. Yes, if he had a daughter, it would've most certainly been April. But now, as he made his way to his home and his children, it was time to see what kinds of destruction awaited him. He had been surprised at seeing all four waiting for him in the front hall, as though they would've met him at the door if they wanted. He had barely gotten out a greeting when his eldest son blurted that he had been drugged.

That of course was cause for alarm, but the old rat couldn't help but be confused by all of that. Had they been captured by Bishop? Again, he had just begun to ask what had happened, when all four began a complicated tale that involved doctors, professors, zombies, and buck teeth. "My sons," Splinter asked slowly. "You mean to tell me that you have met with doctors and professors to stop zombies with buck teeth?"

"What?" Donatello asked, surprised.

"Where'd you get a weird story like that?" asked Michelangelo.

"We killed an innocent man because we thought he was a zombie!" Leonardo shouted.

"He was!" Raphael growled. "He had blood around his mouth!"

"Pizza sauce!" the eldest argued. "It was pizza sauce, Raph."

"Not possible."

"Well you tell me, Mister Zombie Expert," Leonardo spouted. "Do zombies eat pizza?"

"Better than eating people, dudes," Michelangelo replied.

"_Shizukani!_"

All four stopped their arguing immediately, turning towards their father. It was very rare now for Master Splinter to speak Japanese, especially outside of the dojo. When the turtles were smaller and learning to speak, Splinter first taught them in Japanese. It was his native tongue and what he understood from living with Tang Shen, Yoshi, and Mashimi. As he learned English, the language of his adoptive country, he also began teaching his sons this as well. As they grew older however, they spoke more English than Japanese; Leonardo still retained most of his knowledge, though Raphael and Donatello had forgotten most, they were still able to communicate on a basic level. Michelangelo had almost forgotten the language entirely (all his favorite shows were in English).

To speak Japanese in their household was for very rare occasion, usually during training. Outside of the dojo, for Master Splinter to speak it, there had to be a problem or he was angry.

It was the latter at the moment.

Even if Michelangelo had forgotten most of the language he first learned, there were still phrases that triggered his brain to do what the command said, whether he knew what it meant or not. Fortunately, he and his brothers were well aware of this command. This was 'be quiet', something he and his brothers heard a lot when they were smaller and supposed to be sleeping. To his brain, it screamed, 'shut up!'.

"Leonardo," the ninja master commanded. "What has happened?"

The eldest gave an abridge version of the nights events, solemnly recounting their chase of Bobby Lawless. He tried his best to minimalize the larger damage that their actions had taken – yes, his immediate younger brother had killed someone, but he had killed a killer, someone who was preying on their friends. While no excuse could be had to taking someone's life, Bushido dictated that death inflicted as a means to end tearany and suffering was still an honorable thing. That's why Leo never lost sleep knowing he had a hand in killing the Shredder, twice.

Splinter was stunned to say the least. While he knew his second son was prone to outbursts of anger, especially when aimed at someone who was unjust, it was not Raphael's 'style' so to speak to give into that hatred and to murder someone. No, his sons were not murderers in the sense that they would just go about slaughtering strangers for the hell of it. However, the elderly rat and ninja master wasn't sure what to make of this.

Zombies? Certainly he and his boys had seen stranger things happen, but…zombies? For some reason, placed against aliens, other dimensions, and other worlds the very thought of zombies seemed so farfetched it was ludicrious. That wasn't to say that Splinter doubted his sons – they had believed this Lawless person was hurting their friends in the homeless community and his sons were no less loyal to them as they were to April or Casey.

No, he didn't think he was mad about them chasing the man, especially when he had apparently attacked his eldest son. No, he was mostly mad that the four thought to cover this up. Normally, when they had saved an innocent or stopped a crime, they would notify the authorities. In this case, they did not, nor had they inquired as to the safety of the Professor or the nurse who watched over him and his people. No, his sons had been more concerned with having a story ready to tell when he arrived home.

That's what disappointed him the most.

And he was sure the four of them knew it, too. They could sense it, see it on his face that he was far from happy with this turn of events. And with anything, his punishment was swift. There would be no TV for any of them, no video games or comics, no time spent on a computer, and most certainly no patrolling. He had expected the whimpering from Michelangelo over the TV and games; had expected the forlorn sigh from Donatello at the lost of his computer; he even expected the outburst from Raphael over no patrolling. He didn't expect that all four would rage.

"Sensei, that's not fair!"

"_Juuban!_" The four turtles were silent once more as they stood before their father and teacher. "Do you think my decision is too harsh?" he asked, in a low tone. "I have raised you all to never take a life unless necessary."

"But Sensai…"

"_Sore de juubun desu, Raphael!_" Splinter commanded. "I am very disappointed in you boys. I expected my sons to use caution when attempting a matter so serious as this. This was not like our enemies, whom we know have acted callously and without honor; this was a different matter entirely and should have been handled by those in proper authority. My decision for your punishments still stands and will stand for an entire month." The groans he expected.

"Would you like me to raise it to two months?" That stopped them. "To begin, perhaps you boys should clean up around here. It will keep you busy for a few hours at least. _Wakarimasu ka_?"

"_Hai, Sensei._"

Nodding, the old rat headed towards his room, knowing his sons were probably and quite possibly angry with them, though they knew these punishments were not to cause them pain. That was the difficulty in being a parent – there were just some things that needed to be done that were always the hardest.

After having such an easy day and then coming back to surprised carnage, Splinter had figured he'd go into his room, do his normal meditation routine, and then heading off to bed. Maybe it was that his day was filled with watching TV or the shocking revelation he came to, the ninja master found it hard to shut down like he normally did. Sighing, he figured some warm tea and the news should relax him enough to begin his meditations.

Leaving his quarters, he passed the boys as they swept and cleaned. They had known better than to slack on chores while he was gone, but it no less stopped the grumbling he heard from Michelangelo. Grabbing his herbal tea, Master Splinter made himself comfortable in his recliner before turning on the multiple TVs that Donatello had again installed, thanks to 'encouragement' from his younger sibling. He just caught the middle of the local news when a story came on that seemed interesting.

_"Police are baffled tonight as a found murder victim suddenly disappears from the morgue," the anchor was saying. "twenty-seven year old Robert Lawless was found earlier tonight near the west side area of Central Park. Police believed he was a victim of either a mugging or a drug deal gone wrong. He was pronounced dead at the scene and quickly driven to St. Joseph's Hospital."_

Donatello and Leonardo, who had been sweeping, quickly stopped their movement as one, dropping their supplies and hurrying over. "I'm sure there's still more sweeping to do," Splinter replied, looking at them from the corner of his eyes.

"We will, Master Splinter," Leonardo said, absently. "It's just…this is the man we…attacked tonight."

_"The coroner was found within the morgue brutally attacked and the body of Mr. Lawless had disappeared. Police are urging anyone with information to call…"_

By the time the story was over, all four of his sons stood at the back of their couch, in stunned silence. "But…but that's impossible," Donatello murmured. "He was dead."

"I noticed that," Raphael replied.

"You put a sai through his heart," Leonardo whispered.

"I noticed that, too."

"Wrong move, Raphie," Michelangelo said, shaking his head. "Vampires you kill through the heart, zombies you kill through the head. I don't think we killed our guy like we thought."

"My sons," Splinter motioned, trying to get their attention. Slowly, they all looked at him, though they were still shocked. "We can do nothing for the poor being that was the coroner, but we must protect our friends in case he still is after them. Perhaps I can be lenient on this matter, however it will be a one time deal."

The four hurriedly bowed. "Thank you, Sensei," Leonardo whispered, grabbing his swords as he and his brothers rushed out the door.

"Be careful, my sons."

* * *

There was no question in anyone's minds that Jules and the Professor were probably in danger. Whether this Bobby Lawless knew where their homeless friends were, it didn't matter as there were homeless that were still on the street and those were the ones he had access to. A quick call ensured the Professor was indeed back on the homeless barge, while Jules was supposedly safely within her office.

The four drove to the cemetery, hoping to catch Bobby trying to crawl back in his hole. While risky and a bit unorthodox, it was better than sitting around and waiting for another homeless person to be attacked. Armed with flashlights, Donnie parked the large truck out of sight, but nearby in case they needed it. The graveyard was as creepy during the darkness of night as it was at brightest of days, something that Mikey felt needed to be commented on.

"This place is uber scary."

"Why are we out here, Raphael?" asked Leo.

"It's like I said," the red masked turtle replied. "The likely place that this guy probably came from is right here, especially with Jules finding his body so close by. I think you were right, Brainiac."

"About?"

"I think this is a guy who thinks he's a zombie," Raph concluded. "Only problem is, he's already a zombie."

"That makes no sense!" Mikey whispered.

"This coming from _you_," sneered his older brother.

"Say what you will, oh brother of mine," the younger turtle huffed. "But you know as well as I do that zombies don't just decide to get up one day to have a night on the town. Well, movie zombies do, but not the real ones. The real ones need to be controlled by someone or else they just wander around eating trees or rocks."

"Well then there's gotta be a zombie master or something."

The sounds of an oncoming car alerted the group to an unwanted arrival. "_Keiru!_" Leo whispered, telling his brothers to vanish out of sight. Only when the car got within eyesight did Mikey notify the others that it was Jules' SUV. Knowing that they were among a friend, Leo gave the signal to return to the open, just as Jules was stepping around the car. "Evening, Turtles," she said, a friendly smile on her face and light accent in her words.

"Hello Jules," Leo greeted with a small bow of his head. He noticed Donnie pointing to his teeth, probably alluding to the fact that Jules' were perfectly fine. "What're you doing out here?"

"I heard from the Professor that you had found something about the killer," she replied. "I was hoping I could help."

"It's appreciated," Leo answered, smiling at the nurse. "Actually, what could you tell us about Bobby Lawless?"

"He was a friend of yours, yeah?"

Jules nodded sadly. "I heard about that too," she whispered. "I didn't know him very well, just that he and his aunt lived neared the RV park that's outside of town. And that he delivered for a local pizza place. I'm…not sure if that helps you any."

"Yeah," Raph said, nodding his head. "You did good. You know, if you don't mind, we got one more favor you."

"Sure."

"Mind watching the kids?" the turtle asked, nodding his head towards his younger siblings. "I got a hunch."

"I know you aren't going alone?" Leo wondered.

Raph rolled his eyes. "Why do you think I have her watching the kids?" He chuckled at the looks Don and Mike were giving him. Glancing at Jules with a knowing look, he whispered to Donnie, "Don't say I never did nuttin' fer ya." Clapping his brainy brother on the back, Raph and Leo quickly headed to the Battle Shell.

"Sorry for my brother," Donnie apologized.

"No biggie," the nurse smiled. "I have some cocoa and coffee in the car. Do you…" Jules didn't finish the sentence before an orange and green blur ran past them. The blur was already in the backseat with a cup, happily grinning at those on the outside.

Rolling his eyes, Donnie sighed. "Another apology is warranted here, I'm sure."

Jules giggled. Donnie thought it was so very cute. "No worries, Don," she whispered, leading him back to the car. Once inside, she handed Mikey's cup back to him, now full of cocoa and handed a cup to Donnie, whose was filled with coffee. They sat in silence, well for the first two minutes. The next ten were filled with Mikey's boredom whine before the younger turtle curled up and went to sleep.

"Younger brothers," Donnie chuckled. "The bane of my existence."

"Don't be so hard on him," Jules replied. "He's probably had a full day, with zombies no less." They shared a quiet laugh, before Jules casually looked at the turtle. "What do you think, Don?" she asked. "About zombies?"

"Well," the brainy turtle began. "It depends on which version you go with. The movies have you believe that zombies are just flesh eating monsters, bent on world consumption of the human race. However, in the most realistic version, if you believe in black magic and voodoo, zombies are just people brought back to a mindless existence. Just to serve the person who brought them back. They are nothing more than slaves."

Jules made a small noise of agreement. "I…I'd like to apologize about Bobby," she said. Donnie tried to wave her off, but she stopped him. "No, no," she said. "That's the truth. He makes us look bad…"

Donnie blinked, bringing a hand to his eyes. Suddenly he felt absolutely exhausted and he thought his vision was going all blurry.

"He's a great guy when you get to know him, but…" Jules paused to shake her head. "He just doesn't understand the concept of…low profile."

The brainy turtle turned his head, looking at the woman in front of him. Somewhere, a part of him was telling him he was just drugged. There was probably chloral hydrate in his drink and he was now experiencing the symptoms.

Another part of him was screaming at him to escape. This woman had just given him a mickey and he was still sitting in the car. Isn't that how horror movies happened? _Why are you still sitting!?_

And yet another part of him noticed that her eyes were so lovely and that part of him was a dirty pervert who hoped she had drugged in order to take advantage. Man, that would be _hot_!

"But he is a member of this community," she continued. "It was never the intention to let him go roaming around, but he had enough control it seemed alright. After all, appearance is everything. Unfortunately, I underestimated you and your brothers. I didn't think a few missing homeless people would get your attention."

Donnie tried to say something, tried to scream, cry, anything that would hopefully wake his sleeping brother behind him. _Oh God, she drugged him too!_ His mind screamed. _And again, why in hell are you still in the car!?_ This was exactly how all those horror movies ended or began. She was going to turn him and Mikey into zombie turtle stew, he just knew it. He was immobile, even as Jules took the empty cup from him. His mind screamed loudly and he could only offer up three words in defense.

"Oh frub mre."

* * *

Meanwhile, at the RV Park, nothing was stirring, not even a mouse. However, two turtles were searching around for something, anything. For being abandoned, there were sure signs of some life around. There were some trailers that stood in a small circle, including the one that Raph and Casey had taken down earlier.

"What's your hunch?" Leo whispered, scanning the area for any trace of current activity.

"You heard what Jules said," his brother whispered back. "That Lawless kid and his aunt live or used to live here. Don't you find that a bit strange?"

"No." Leo said. "Why? Should I?"

"This place has been closed for like three years," Raph informed him. "Nobody should still be living here. It was condemned. The city's just too lazy to tear it down. They haven't found anything to replace it with. 'Sides," he stopped, bending down to pick up what looked like a candy wrapper and a fresh one at that. "For a place that's abandoned, it sure has attracted a lot of attention."

"Be alert," the elder turtle warned. "If your hunch is right, we aren't alone."

"More for a party then."

The two made their way towards the trailer that had previous been spinning out of control. Opening the door, the two crept in, looking around for anything suspicious. Raph's eyes landed on something large and black towards the wall. Raising an eye ridge, he tapped Leo on the shoulder. "Do long, black coffins count as suspicious?"

Leo looked around his brother and indeed, saw a long black coffin. "Well," he murmured. "It's an interesting center piece."

The two went over, still a bit weary about a giant coffin in the corner of a trailer. Raph immediately went to raise the lid, but Leo stopped him. "At least knock first."

Raph gave his brother a sour look, but decided to humor the elder turtle. Knocking loudly on the coffin, he said, "Wakey, wakey!" The two nearly jumped from their shells when Bobby Lawless opened the lid and tried lunging for them. It was only their ninja training that managed to save the two from the man's grasp, as well as allowing them to jump on his casket, thus keeping the man trapped.

"C'mon Bobby," Raph wheezed. "Play nice!"

Leo tried steadying the lid, glancing out the window to see if they had alerted anyone with their loud noises. And the sight before him left him cold. It was though they just suddenly appeared, completely out of the woodwork. There wasn't too many, maybe about twenty or so – nothing he and Raph couldn't handle – but the very fact that they had not only just appeared, but were converging on them left the leader in a panic.

"Oh fuck!"

It was like the world nearly stopped; well for Raphael it did. He could literally count the number of times he had heard his older brother swear. Literally on one hand, he could count them. This would be number three. And he wasn't even counting the times he had done it in Japanese. So to hear his much more calmer, more disciplined older sibling curse, something was probably bad. Good ole turtle luck. Looking at the small window, the red masked turtle immediately saw the problem at hand.

And he didn't like it one bit.

"What're the chances they're here to welcome us to the neighborhood?" he joked, nervously at that.

"They aren't here to make friends."

Stabbing a sai between the handles of the casket, both elder brothers jumped off and away from their special zombie friend. "We stay here and baracade or we go out and greet them?" Leo asked, removing one of his swords. The two felt the trailer start to shake and knew if they wanted to have at least an equal chance of surviving, staying inside would not do.

Raph growled. "Let's go say hi to the neighbors."

The two burst through the front door, knocking several zombies back, but when two fell, it seemed like ten replaced them. They didn't look so harmless from inside, but outside, they were a force to be reckoned with. Leo soon lost sight of Raph and it didn't matter how many punches and kicks he delivered, they still kept coming. Leo wasn't stupid; he had watched his share of zombie movies too and he knew the most effected way was to stab these things in the head or to decapitate them. But in his heart, he didn't want to do that. If Raph was right and they were being manipulated by someone else, then he would be committing a violent act against innocent people who just wanted to rest in peace.

He couldn't in all conscience do that.

He didn't get a chance.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Here is the final chapter of this fic. Again, I would like to thank all the reviewers and readers for not only taking time to check this out, but to welcome me to TMNT! Many thanks go Mikell and RhodaJ for their support and reviews. Please check out their fics.

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**EPILOGUE**

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_The next morning, a mutant turtle named Leonardo awoke in an alley behind an office building. He was a bit disorientated, but otherwise alright. To his left was another mutant turtle, this one going by the name Raphael. The two seemed fine, if a bit dizzy and of course confused. Hearing their names, the two looked up to see two more mutants coming from the back door to the building._

_"What happened?" asked Raph._

_"I'm not sure," Donnie replied. "Mikey and I woke up a few minutes ago and found you here. The Battle Shell's over there –" he pointed to their right. "Completely out of sight, just like we decided to go camping or something in a doctor's office."_

_"Where is everyone?" Leo asked._

_"Gone," Mikey said, shrugging. "It's like a complete ghost town in there. Like there was no one in the building for years."_

_"She left?" asked Raph. "What about…?"_

_"I used the truck's onboard computer to look it up," Donnie said. "City workers are probably there, mowing the whole place down."_

_Raph wasn't sure he understood any of this. Slowly, he turned to Leo, hoping the leader had some thought. Leo just looked back at him, more confused than anything else…_

"And that's what happened?" asked April. The group had made their way from the kitchen to the living to set up for their movie. In the process, the guys began telling the red-head about the adventure that had gotten them grounded.

"Well," Donnie replied. "I can't confirm or deny anything that the others experienced while I wasn't there…"

"Nor can we confirm or deny anything that happened with Donnie outside of our involvement," Leo added.

"I wouldn't know," Mikey replied. "I was drugged."

"But that's…essentially…exactly what happened," Raph finished.

"Especially about Karai's ass."

"Mikey!"

**THE END**


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